The Power of Subtraction

For years, I spent my walks and runs plugged into a playlist or podcast. Then I decided to unplug about a year ago, realizing I was denying myself the full experience the Ashokan Reservoir backdrop offers. Walking in silence is anything but quiet. Even when I’m lost in my own thoughts, it’s hard to not appreciate the wind whispering through the trees on a breezy day, or the birds fervently filling the air with their song.

Now silence has become an insatiable craving on my walks, providing the soundtrack for me to think and fully be in the moment. By removing one kind of sound, I opened the door to experience all the other ones around me. The power of subtraction.

I was reminded of one of my favorite episodes of Hidden Brain, Innovation 2.0: Do Less recently when it came on the radio in the car. I’m an avid fan of To Do lists. They help keep me focused both in my personal and professional life. I’m intrigued by the idea of a stop-doing list, Leidy Klotz, the guest on this episode of Hidden Brain, mentions. We coast through our lives racking up lists of things we need to get done without necessarily contemplating what needs to be removed from our routines. Instead we insist on finding a 25th hour in the day. 

As I often say—every no is a yes to something else. I go about my days constantly editing my To Do list, adapting to changing needs. My intuition and experience tells me many people are good at this from a work perspective. Now imagine how much more balanced our personal lives would be if we applied this same idea. 

When the kids were little I had a “one birthday party” rule for the weekends, and only on Saturdays. I had no desire to run from party to party, as I often saw friends do. We never accepted invites to parties on Sundays. That was our family day, and I protected our time together fiercely. In hindsight, those Sundays were even more precious, considering Michael died when the kids were 3 and 8 years old. I guess I’ve been practicing the power of subtraction long before Leidy Klotz put a name to it.

This mindset is especially helpful when staying on track with your personal goals. Two words that are front and center in my mind are prioritize and reprioritize. It’s easy—too easy, to let one “off track” moment sideline the bigger goals we set. Reframing the conversation I have with myself, and then reprioritizing my To Do lists is a daily exercise, often multiple times a day.

I’m loving the lingering daylight but it also threw me off balance a few weeks ago. I suddenly found it too challenging to balance the end of my work day, evening sunset walks to hit my steps, eating dinner at a reasonable time, and going to bed early enough to get at least seven hours of sleep. 

Macro Tracking Meal Tip

So one morning I woke up, and decided to get a good chunk of my steps in before starting the rest of my day. It ended up setting the tone for keeping myself moving all day long. Rather than leaving all my steps to the end of the day, I felt so accomplished hitting 7,000 before 8:00am. Meeting the rest of my steps felt like a good challenge instead of a difficult chore.

Since I began this routine three weeks ago my morning walks have grown longer. Now my personal goal is 10 before 10—as in 10,000 steps before 10:00am. It feels so good to prioritize myself in this way. What I had to let go of, though, was watching Virginia get on the school bus every morning. She’s very independent and responsible, so there was never a worry she’d miss the bus. 

Then one morning, I looked at the time, and saw her school bus coming ‘round route 28A to cross over the reservoir bridge. It felt like the perfect compromise had landed in my lap without even trying. I could get in my steps and see her off, even if she couldn’t see me. That day I let go of the mom guilt—I’m going to try and leave that on the stop-doing list permanently.—xo, j.