Gougères {French Cheese Puffs}
how to make NYE special even if you're staying home
2021 was a mixed bag of the highest highs and lowest lows.
Among the high points was getting married to a truly kind, caring human being who loves me fiercely, makes me laugh, and most importantly in any relationship—he listens.
He doesn’t always like what I have to say but he listens, and we talk. Our conversations are sometimes heated, a lot more so during this first year of marriage, but I remind him that difficult conversations, even ones where I sound agitated and loud are not the end of our world. These are the conversations that move our marriage forward.
Isabella graduated high school and began college, a milestone I thought about a lot these last 10 years since Michael died but never really knew how we’d get there—it all felt so far away and a little insurmountable. But, get there we did, and now Isabella has a full semester of college done.
Virginia was diagnosed on the spectrum (ASD1) and with moderate depression. Finding this out was ironically a high point but getting there meant traveling through some of the hardest, darkest moments our family has faced. I hope to one day in this coming year sit down and write more about this because I think our story will benefit at least a few of you, and maybe even arm you with the information you need to properly advocate for your child.
My hard work in 2020 as the pandemic took hold brought the reward of a promotion in the early part of 2021, which led to me phasing out of the test kitchen. Many people were surprised this is something I’d want to do but I was more than ready for new challenges. That change in work gave me clarity about In Jennie’s Kitchen, and what I wanted that to look like after 12 years of writing my blog. You’ve all embraced this new journey with such enthusiasm—words simply cannot express my thanks for your support.
The highs and lows of this year were companions, and without one, the other would’ve ceased to exist. I don’t think life has to be a struggle for us to appreciate the happier moments, but I know from experience that the more peaceful, less chaotic times are richer, more meaningful because of those more challenging ones.
I’m going to pause these thoughts for a quick moment, and switch gears to some housekeeping, of sorts. This is what happens with stream of conscious writing…
You might’ve noticed that all posts are free to read, with a paywall set up before the recipes. This felt like a happy medium. I know there are many of you who have followed along for years even though my recipes don’t fit your dietary needs. This is why I decided to make the posts open for anyone to read, so we could continue to stay in touch so to speak.
As 2022 unfolds, I’ll be moving more and more of my recipes from my original site over to here or into future e-cookbooks as I did with the Christmas Recipes e-cookbook. My gourgéres recipe is a new “old” one that’s making the move today. It felt timely given tomorrow is New Year’s Eve. Well, actually by time you read it, my tomorrow will be your today.
Gougéres only sound fancy, when in fact they’re very easy to make. I usually always have a stash in the freezer to bake off when I want a no-fuss fancy-feeling snack with wine or a cocktail at the end of the day—but, of course, alcohol isn’t necessary, so add your favorite beverage, regardless.
My wish for us all, myself included, as this year closes, is that instead of pondering what we wish had happened differently, we leave 2021 with a sense of clarity about what brought us closer to a feeling of inner peace. Let’s carry that with us into 2022.
We’ve no way of knowing what 2022 will bring, and while I’m tempted to say we can resolve to walk into it—and through it, with thoughtful intention, I hesitate as I write it. As the mother of a child with depression and the sister of someone who’s bipolar, I understand it just isn’t that easy or fair to make a blanket statement.
Where does that leave them? I don’t know, except to say that I will work harder at listening, building patience, and learning not everything in this life is about me or my feelings. It’s not personal, it’s business—to quote a line from Emily in Paris, the show everyone loves to hate (but I think secretly loves). That’s a good way of learning to navigate my relationship with Virginia, and anyone on the spectrum or managing life with mental illness.
So, for my part, I will go back to focusing on my own internal foundations, and get back to morning meditation and walks—both things that had to go on pause mid-November once the intensity of the holidays dropped down like a brick house.
I’ll remind myself that perfect is a fun, yet unattainable idea.
I’ll remind myself that sometimes “okay” is enough because showing up and being present is what matters most.
Happy New Year, to all of you. —xo, j.
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