August Newsletter

what I've been cooking & reading lately

The last photo I took of my mom was her sleeping in bed at the nursing home just a few days before she died. She looked so peaceful and calm, and something told me it was a moment I had to capture. I’ve looked back at that photo often this past month.

The nursing home was 123 miles away. Sometimes I’d make it weekly for a couple of months, and then life would happen, and months would pass between trips there, with regular updates from my sister to bridge the distance. I think this is why even though I know she’s gone, my mind tricks me into thinking she’s still just sleeping, the photo now a moment of suspended animation in my mind.

At this point in life it seems there’s more goodbyes than hellos. I’m wondering how to turn that around, or at least balance the two. Getting lost in a new book is one way to increase the hellos. Having just got off a deep read with Nicola Twiley’s Frostbite, I finally picked up Visual Thinking by Temple Grandin again. I first started this book almost three years ago while navigating the public school system, advocating for Virginia, and have been reading it in stops and starts. Suddenly, my appetite for it became insatiable, and I consumed most of it within a week—until I got to the last chapter. I wasn’t ready for another goodbye, so I’m saving that last bit for when I need it most. Am I the only one who feels like this with books?

To bridge the gap, the next one I began reading was a book I happened to buy just before my mom passed away, The Poppy Fields by Nikki Erlick. What if you could sleep away your grief, and wake up feeling lighter, the weight of it more manageable to navigate life without the ones you love most? Erlick’s writing isn’t particularly eloquent. She goes to great lengths to make her characters jump off the page, sometimes too much of a stretch, with her writing feeling more like a student trying to check off all the boxes of a writing prompt.

Where she excels is the premise of her novels. They’re very unique, and when she focuses on the core message it’s easy to lose track of time, or bargain with yourself before bedtime, silently whispering, “just one more page”. The Poppy Fields, even with its imperfect writing, is exactly the message my heart and mind needed last month. I’m now onto Susan Cain’s Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking.

My other escape has been the kitchen, a place I can always take shelter in when I need to find a sense of control and calm. I recently made a batch of chocolate chip cookies using this recipe for my homemade mix. I love that it’s a one-bowl recipe, ready in about 30 minutes from start to finish. No need to soften butter or pull out the mixer, though you can use one if you like.

Virginia and I have also been on a homemade zucchini fry kick. This recipe is my go-to, with two slight changes: I use finely ground breadcrumbs instead of panko since that works better in the air-fryer, and I’ve been cutting them into sticks like fries. Seasoned breadcrumbs add more flavor, and they’re very easy to make yourself. Depending on the size of your air-fryer, you’ll have to cook them in batches. Lay the coated zucchini on a piece of parchment cut to fit the size of your air-fryer basket. Spray them with cooking oil, bake at 400ºF for 6 to 8 minutes until browned on top, then flip and cook for another 4 to 6 minutes until browned on the other side.

After a months’ long sleep in the fridge, my sourdough starter is back in action again—this recipe, the loaf pictured at the beginning of the newsletter, is a favorite. Fresh pasta was also on the menu last weekend, tossed with some sauteed cremini mushrooms in a lemon butter sauce. Here’s hoping we all find moments of peace and calm this month. Be well, and remember to be kind. —xo, j.